Time Flies....

The new year started on the shore of Lake Huron with my trusted companion, Jackson. The wind, the waves, the crisp cold air, the sand underfoot…a perfect way to kick off 2022.

Now, almost a year later, time has flown by in an absolute blur. We’re warned that as we get older, time seems to go by more quickly, but my god, I didn’t expect it to feel like this!

These two love the snow and cold weather. They both had a challenging summer having been diagnosed with environmental asthma, thanks to the hot, dry, ragweed-filled summer months that we had. Never would I have thought I’d be buying a Costco membership for Reactine for my horses, but with Bruno taking 36 a day at one point (remembering he’s an almost 2000lb draft horse) and Lightning not far behind that total, it was the only option. All of the various treatments we tried, unfortunately, didn’t seem to help all that much, so I was so relieved when the cooler weather set in and their breathing returned to normal, their noses stopped running and we could back off the meds. They’re now back to being the wooly mammoths they turn into in the winter months and are as content as content can be.

I wandered through the field of lavender at Baroque Botanicals ,then back through the wheat field and forest trails and completed my visit with their beautiful Friesien horses and amazing owners. I look forward to their open house and it’s a favourite way to spend a summer day. They make the most luxurious products from their lavender and I swear by their facial oil, lip balm, candles and room spray. Honestly, all of their products are fantastic!

Jackson and I spent a very relaxing few days at a friend’s cottage by Parry Sound and it was just what the doctor ordered. Sun, reading, more sun, lounging on the dock, a few bevies and lots of time with the fur babe. I think he was just as sad as I was (if not possibly more) when it came time to say good-bye. Jacks is a whole other dog when he gets into the countryside. He’s almost always ‘on guard’ at our house, but when he gets outside the city limits, I can actually see him physically relax and he becomes so at ease. Warms my heart!

It was a year full of beauty, from that gorgeous bouquet from my friend, May Moon Flowers, to some absolutely stunning sunsets and finding my furry pots of gold at the end of that rainbow. I will always be amazed and absolutely appreciate the wonders of the outdoors and what it provides for us.

I look back on this year with gratitude and while it feels like it was just yesterday that I was standing on the shore of Lake Huron, ushering in 2022, at the same time, it feels like it was so long ago. From road trips with friends, to days at the farm or the Country House, encouraging myself to always take the back roads/scenic route (and finding your dream farm for sale but unfortunately not winning the lottery to be able to purchase it) and my ever evolving City Cottage, this year has been filled with many lessons and I’ve learned much more about myself for many reasons. I look at the little world I have formed around me and can’t help but smile and feel a sense of calm in this rather chaotic world. Cheers the the year that has passed and I look forward to the new year ahead. I have a really good feeling for what’s to come in 2023 and thank you to you all for coming along for the ride both in the past, today and in the future.

RR

Farm Life...

When you grow up across the road from a field like this, how can you not dream about life in the country?

This farm has a long, tree lined driveway, rolling hills/pastures, a hard wood forest lined with trails, ponds etc…it literally checks all the boxes. I remember that we’d spend Sunday mornings in the kitchen of the red brick farm house, enjoying warm muffins just out of the oven then we’d head back to the bush to cut wood for our woodstove to help us stay nice and cozy in the cold Huron County winters.

If I won the lottery tomorrow, I have a short list of farms I would drive up the laneway of, knock on the door and make them an offer they hopefully couldn’t refuse. I don’t need a big, lavish barn or a 4000 sqft farmhouse…I’d like a modest set up, ideally set in rolling hills with of trees lining the laneway/paddocks and trails to ride/hike on.

These are some of my photos of farms/country properties I admire and who knows, maybe one day I’ll have one of my own ;)

Always remember….

DREAM BIG!!

RR

It's Been A While.....How Are You...No Really...How Are You?

It really has been a while….Almost 10 months since my last post.

If you had asked me what 2020 was going to look like when I wrote my post on March 8th, never in a trillion years would I have been able to begin to fathom what the year was going to bring to us all….to our entire planet. When you think of it that way…our entire planet….it gives me goosebumps, but for all the wrong reasons.

I was able to sneak away for a weekend to a friends cottage this summer and as I sat on the dock and looked up at the stars one night, I was reflecting on a number of things and that’s when it truly hit me…That sense of ‘the entire planet’…..It was enough to bring tears to my eyes and made me take a few deeps breaths to collect myself.

Noting all of our lives have literally been turned upside town, twisted, shaken and triple lutzed (yes, I was a figure skater back in the day) how are you? And I mean REALLY…how… are...you?

I truly hope you are doing as well as you can. I’m absolutely certain there are days that are better then others and I hope you are finding ways to get through the more challenging days in a healthy and mindful manner. I appreciate that it can be difficult to do so, but if there is one thing the last 10 months have allowed for is the ability to take a step back and really come to realize who and what is important in my life. Who has been there to talk to, what has brought joy, what has brought sadness or disappointment, who has disappeared from my life….I hope that if there is one positive thing that has come from 2020 is that you have been able to examine your life and bring close those people and things that bring in goodness and let go of those that don’t. It sure has for me!

Overall, I’d say that I’m doing alright. I have a lot to be grateful for and I really try to focus on that on the days that seem a little extra crazy. I honestly have no idea how it’s December this week and I truly feel that 2020 has been a bit of a blur at times. I started a new job…twice…yes, twice during this time and wow, has onboarding been quite the unique experience. Meeting new co-workers over virtual meetings, learning the ins and outs of an organization via a computer and phone calls and working from home full time (which I am immensely grateful for, though there is something to say about human connection). I work in a field that thrives on human connection, being able to speak to people in person and face to face, to be able to read body language, have deep, meaningful conversations and all of that has been put to the test during this time but overall, has been a success!

And speaking of connection….I think you all know how much I love animals and feel that having a connection to them is extremely healing and cathartic. Well….as of April, I added a third fur babe to the family. If you follow me on social media, you would have already met Jackson and learned how I am officially a ‘foster fail’. This smart, sweet and loving pooch came to me via Fur-Ever Able Dog Rescue and it was literally meant to be. He has been such a wonderful companion through all of this for many reasons. First and foremost, he has the sweetest personality and to see him come out of his shell has been so inspiring. We still have some work to do around socialization, which has proven challenging during this time of physical distancing, but he has come such a long way and made great improvement. He’s a great motivator to get outside and be active as we both need to work on our conditioning this days! Overall, having the stars align to have him come home has been an extremely bright light these past months. Having him around to bring a smile to my face and to literally make me laugh out loud has been so fantastic!

I will admit, that laughter has been very helpful as there are times I feel as though I’m living in the movie Groundhog Day (and I’m sure that this is a feeling a lot of us share). I’ve gone from being on the road almost everyday with work to not having had an in person meeting in months. It sure has been a shift. One thing I have come to realize, mainly on my trips to the farm to see the two big fur boys, is how much I enjoy driving. How much thinking I do when I’m driving and how it allows me to clear out some room in my headspace. Those trips to and from the farm are really most of the driving I do nowadays and I’m grateful for that time to turn up the music, get behind the wheel and think….process…and clear my mind.

Another thing that has really been reinforced is the comfort of home. If you’ve followed my journey the past 10 years or so, you’re well aware of the fact of how I value and find the importance of making a house truly your home as an extension of you/your family. To make it that extension of you and your family, so that when you are within its walls you feel like you are in a comforting cocoon it takes being surrounded by not only the people but pieces, colours, textures and momentos that you love and are, in a way, an extension of you. I often write about how creating this type of space and environment takes time. To fill your home with what you love, what inspires you, what brings a smile to your face can take years and that’s truly what this past year has helped me realize even more so. I look around my home and I see a gallery wall of memories from trips that let me travel back to those experiences via those photos. I see a piece of driftwood from an afternoon at the beach, a piece of pottery from a local artisan, my table and desk that mean so much because my brother created and built them for me, cozy pillows and throws from a small business here in town and the list could go on and on. I’m grateful to have a space that I truly do feel at home in. A home that is an extension of me and what I love and I will admit, having that feeling in my 800sqft lil cottage has had an incredible calming effect this year.

Another thing you know if you’ve been ‘a regular’ to the blog and my social media (especially Instagram - Rustic Retrievals) is how important supporting local and small businesses is to me. If there is one silver (and maybe even golden) lining of 2020 is the positive spotlight it has shone on the importance of shopping locally and supporting our friends and neighbours and their small businesses. It has broken my heart to see shops/businesses close after years of their owners dedicating their heart and soul to their passion project. I have witnessed first hand how friends and family have had to constantly shift gears to stay afloat during these times and I cannot applaud them enough for doing so. One thing that has warmed my heart, however, is how the year has strengthen the sense of community, at least in the ‘town’ I live in, Guelph, Ontario. Yes, we have seen businesses close, yet we have also seen businesses start and thrive during these times. I regularly ‘shout out’ via my Instagram stories my favourite local businesses and small businesses across Ontario and I encourage you to do the same. Yes, if we can purchase their products, that’s amazing and supportive, but even sharing their accounts and stories through your own social media platform can go a long way as you never know who may see what you’ve posted and that person could turn into a new customer for that shop or business. I have promised myself I will blog more as I really enjoy the craft of writing and I will be sure to share many of my favourite small and local businesses in posts to come…so stay tuned. And in the meantime, keep watching my stories on Instagram to get your fill of small business goodness!

I could keep going and going as this sunshine really has me inspired today…but…I’ll leave it here.

I wanted to check in to see how you truly are doing provide a bit of an update on the year that has been 2020 and alllll the craziness that it has brought along.

I wish you all good health and please, be safe. We’re all in this together…we truly are…and we’ll all get through this if we keep that sense of community well being alive and well.

Take good care and keep your eyes open for more posts to come….I’m back at it and can’t wait to share so much more with you! :) xo

RR

You Deserve Better...

I have this quote on my wall near my front door…

• “The moment that you start to wonder if you deserve better, you do.”

Let that sink in for a moment….

How many times have you wondered that…. ‘I deserve better’…. in the past day…week…year?

It’s International Women’s Day today and what better day to take a moment and think about, reflect on what we truly deserve.

I’m a participant in Danika Brysha’s You Year 2020 program and its scares me a bit to include this in this post, but a part of this program is to identify our Desired Feelings and to look ahead 5 years and write a short biography of 5 years from now.

Here’s what I wrote…

• DESIRED FEELINGS/Biography Of 5 Years From Now:

  Ardis is growth, expansive, proud, self-aware (my Desired Feelings). She operates a therapeutic farm/centre for those with mental and physical disabilities and the therapies offered are based around animals and the outdoors. Ardis is healthy, confident, fulfilled and has built a career of helping others.

Yes, I’m proud that my career of almost 20 years has already focused around helping others as a R.Kin and a CMDP, holding roles such as a Disability Management Consultant, HRBP, Manager - Group Disability etc, but….I deserve more.

I want to grow and expand. I want to work on my self-awareness and many of us in this type of ‘helping’ profession put the wants and needs of other first, but I deserve to be more aware of me…myself…what I want and what I need in my career, friendships, relationships, health, fitness etc.

Because of this…I’m starting a new chapter…one that I hope will move me towards my goal of having this therapeutic centre in 5 years from now. It’s time to write a new story.

I don’t talk about my career , my ‘9-5’ very often, but I had worked for an employer for 6 years, ventured out to new opportunities for 2 years, returned to that employer for the past 3 years and what I inevitably thought would be my last employer of my career. Well….that just wasn’t how that chapter was written and I start on a new venture tomorrow that I know will bring the growth and expansion I’ve been yearning for, will make me proud and will force me to be more self-aware as this is a brand new slate for me to ensure a more well rounded approach between my work and personal life (I’m not very good at that….at all….just ask my friends and family - ie. vacation, what’s vacation?). I’ll still be working in the field of helping others and I’m getting back to my Disability Management roots, with a flavour of HR thrown in for good measure.

Ladies, one thing I have learned is that we must create our own opportunities. We must drive who we are, who we want to be and where we’re headed. No one is going to take the wheel for you.

We deserve the absolute best.

That being said, what we have currently in front of us could be absolutely fantastic, with no issues or concerns…but…sometimes…that urge, that yearning for something more…something different and more aligned with who we are as an individual surfaces and we’d do ourselves no favours to not at least explore it. That’s the case with me. I’d have kicked myself if I hadn’t thrown my hand up for this opportunity, even though where I was had so many great things about it. I want more…I deserve more…..it’s time to go out and get it!

Like the quote below states….’she woke up different…and it was this day that her life changed’. That view ahead for the next 5 years awoke something in me and while the plans are still in their infancy for my own farm/centre to help others,I’m well on my way and I can’t wait to see what the next 5 years bring because after all, we deserve better!!

RR

Saving Bruno

Oh the power of social media….Little did I know that an innocent scroll through Facebook on December 6, 2018 would change my/our life forever.

I saw a post by Horseshoe Stable of the big, handsome face above and knew I had to go meet him. He had been saved from OLEX (a livestock auction in Waterloo that sees most horses sold there go to slaughter for meat…yes, meat…for human consumption) by the incredible souls at Horseshoe Stable and he was in really rough shape. We arrived at the stable and within minutes…possibly even seconds….I knew this big guy (a Clydesdale/Belgian cross at around 17.2 hands) was meant to be a part of our life….

The photo above is from the evening we met him and the photo below is a full view of the extremely poor physical state that he was in when he arrived at Horseshoe Stable. His eyes were so incredibly sad…..after meeting him I had an hour drive to go see my Mom and I cried the entire trip there. I had never witnessed an animal of this size in such horrible shape and it absolutely broke my heart. I didn’t get any sleep that night and at about 2am, I started a Go Fund Me as I knew at that moment he had to come home to me, our family and our farm family at Rivendell. The initial costs associated with rescuing an animal can be very, very high due to all of the unknowns regarding their health, behaviour, needs etc and this fund would go to help this big guy get the care that he so desperately needed. It was the start of his hashtag… #savingbruno

#savingbruno

He arrived at Rivendell at 7am the morning of December 8, 2019. I wish I had gotten a photo of him on the trailer as he’s so tall and almost had to duck, even on a stock trailer.

He stepped off the trailer and I hope he could feel the immediate love and support around him. We walked around the farm and stood to watch the sunrise on the first day in the next chapter of his life….a chapter full of happiness, lots of treats and the care he deserves. He also met his brother, Lightning, and it was brotherly love at the first touching of their noses.

He settled in well and one of our first endeavours was to have our Veterinarian come out to give him a full check up, his first round of vaccines, float his teeth and clean his sheath. Dr. Molson from McKee-Pownall Equine Services has such a thoughtful and patient manner with these incredible beasts and treated Bruno with such care and compassion. He was sedated to have his teeth floated and you could immediately tell there was something wrong when Dr. Molson opened his mouth…..his teeth/mouth were in horrible condition….in fact, the worst she had ever seen. Bruno has a fairly significant overbite (ie. parrot mouth) and his teeth do not wear properly because of this. Dr. Molson said that if we hadn’t done this when we had, in a few more months his teeth would have curled all the way around and would have started to grow back into his palate. Bruno will require dentistry care every 6 months for the next 2-3 years to get his teeth back to where they should be as we don’t want to take them back too quickly due to nerve endings in the teeth. He was such a trooper through all his initial treatments that morning and after 2 dentistry treatments in the past 8 months, I can tell he’s more comfortable and can masticate his food much more effectively. The photos below show his first and second sessions of dentistry care with Dr. Molson to help grind down or ‘float’ his teeth.

After ensuring a solid baseline from his visit with Dr. Molson, it was then time to figure out his food program (we needed him to gain weight but do so in a steady and healthy manner), get his measurements for tack, blankets etc (he wears the largest halter that Brubacher’s Harness and Tack Shop sells and a size 92 blanket - in comparison, Lightning wears a size 82). He lived his few few months with us in a stall overnight to stay sheltered and warm and then out in the pasture making friends during the day. He now lives outside 24/7 and absolutely loves his life with his field-mates and friends he’s made. He has two hearty meals a day and all the hay a horse could ask for. The first time I fed him an apple, the look on his face was like a little kid on Christmas morning. I have a feeling that he did not get many, if any, treats in his prior life and to see something so simple bring him so much contentedness was oh so heart warming.

I’ll now take you through a photographic journey of the past 7 months, to show you the incredible transformation that has occurred before our eyes, thanks to so many people. We truly do have a family at the farm, led by our farm manager, Lori. I can honestly say that I would not have even fathomed embarking on this journey without knowing she was the foundation of our farm and I truly cannot say ‘thank you’ enough for all that she has done for this big guy….and me! A huge thank you too to my Mom for all of her support (couldn’t have done this without you), the family at Rivendell - Mike, Grace, Chelsea etc, McKee-Pownall, Brubacher’ s, Sharpe Farm Supply, and of course, all of the Go Fund Me supporters. You helped me/us get this guy the new start he deserved and I am so beyond grateful and humbled by your support.

His first few weeks at the farm. The swelling in his legs had just started to subside.

Even with a full winter coat, you can see his ribs :(

He truly is a ray of sunshine.

A bit heavier blanket to keep him warm once the snow decided to stick around - size 92!

Making friends….you can start to see the brightness coming back to his eyes.

So handsome.

Eating dinner with his farm pup friends….

Dirty feet…

Look at that belly!

This first time hanging out in a field with his brother…..the boys :) They live in separate fields as Lightning is in our ‘weight watchers’ field with netted hay while Bruno has the ‘full serve’ option in his.

So shiny….and he’s starting to gain back some muscle tone!

Look at him!!! Such a commanding presence with a spark in his eye!

From the other night…. My happy place….

It has been quite a journey over the past 7-8 months and I wouldn’t change a second of it. We still have a long journey ahead….some work to do with standing much more politely for the farrier (he ‘dances’ as I’m sure he’s had a not great experience previously), more dentistry treatments, more weight to gain, more training to do….but that’s what it’s all about….the journey. Every time I pull down the laneway at the farm and see him standing there in the field, his head buried in a bale of hay or munching on some grass, my eyes well up with tears of happiness. He’s an amazing creature and I’m so glad the fates aligned the way they did to bring us all together!

A huge thank you again to everyone for all of your support….it truly does take a village!

RR

Salle de Bain Reno

You all know how much I LOVE my lil City Cottage. Well, there was one wee part of it that since I bought it, I hadn’t really been a fan of….

Enter space capsule/time machine shower enclosure…

I really liked everything else about my Salle de Bain, but, when the time machine started leaking a wee bit, I felt like I finally had an excuse to reno this tiny space into what I’d always hoped for.

Who better to do this for me than….my brother Mike!! He’d done my gorgeous backyard patio, has built me my stunning dining table and desk and now it was time for him to work his magic on my small space living washroom. Off I went to house sit for a friend who was out of the country and off he went on demo-ing, so we could say ‘so long’ to my space capsule.

When I walked in and saw this (see above) I was so excited but also so scared….what had we gotten ourselves into?? My brother is a contractor so he lives this everyday and to see this space transformed in such a short time was amazing..yet partially terrifying (for all the right reasons). It was literally stripped back to the studs and it was also so nice to see the history of my home that was hidden behind the walls.

My brother had filled the bin with the time capsule and everything else and off we went to Home Depot for a round of supplies. I had picked the stone/pebble tiles about a year and a half before the reno as they had been a fantastic deal (see below) and I knew that I wanted to incorporate them into the room once I was reno-ing it. They were my jumping off point as far as a palette for the small space and I knew they’d add a little, ‘je ne sais quoi’ as well. I found these gorgeous porcelain/stone look tiles at Home Depot for another great deal (see below) and just like that, the core of my bathroom was decided!

Mike found me the PERFECT small space vanity at Rona in Mississauga, at a price point for less than $100 as it was the last in stock (YASSS!!- you’ll see it in the reveal). My goal for this project was to complete in as economical manner as possible, but to not scrimp on quality, hence why we chose to put in a Schluter Shower System (see below). As a Contractor, I can always count on Mike to have done his research and be up to date and well versed on the latest and greatest when it comes to home renovations. With this system being installed, I feel confident in the fact that I will be able to enjoy this space for years to come without a concern.

I left Mike to his devices. I not only trust his skill but also his design savvy. He’s someone that not only thinks about the install but also what the final product will look like as well from an aesthetics perspective and his attention to detail is second to none! For instance, due to his care and concern, he papered over and taped off my hardwood outside the washroom all the way to the door and literally took such calculated steps in laying the first few floor tiles as we knew they’d be pivotal as we were not only tiling the floor but the walls too!

This next piece of attention to detail still blows me away to this day. He was installing the pebble/stone tile as my shower floor and didn’t like how it was angling towards the drain and also didn’t care for how it was looking….so….what does he do? He removes every pebble/stone from it’s backing and places them individually to make up the pebbled floor. INDIVIDUALLY!!!!!!!! Can you believe that level of care and concern for both the practical usage application but also the aesthetics piece? Again…BLOWN AWAY! See below for this gorgeous handiwork and also how he took the time to ensure proper spacing of the wall tile…again, attention to detail is at 110%!

So…..here it is…the BIG REVEAL. To this day, I still can’t believe this incredible space is in my wee cottage!

To say I love it would be such an understatement as it is exactly what I was hoping for…and even more. And, knowing that this is Mike’s handiwork means so much too! I truly feel like I’m walking into a spa every time I cross the threshold!

Below are some photos of my salle de bain today (I feel like I have to call it ‘salle de bain’ vs bathroom as it’s just too nice to be called a boring old bathroom). We’ve put a shower curtain up for now and maybe someday I’ll put up a glass door…but….we’ll see. I’m beyond perfectly happy with it as it is right now! I found a great small space storage solution at Homesense that houses my day to day toiletries and works perfectly with the vanity and also blends in against the tile. I also love how the colours change in the room, depending on the time of day and natural light coming in.

And last, but certainly not least, is the HUGE THANK YOU to my brother Mike for all of his incredibly hard work, time and attention to this project…I truly cannot say thank you enough!

If you’d like to work with Mike, his email address is Bigfoot.Contracting.TO@gmail.com and he’s located in Toronto, with projects around the GTA. Be sure to keep an eye out for his logo and you’ll be sure that a one-of-a-kind true piece of craftsman ship is being created at that site.

And P.S., if you’d like assistance with your renovation design or home decor/styling, you can contact me at rusticretrievals@gmail.com or on Instagram. I’d be happy to help you transform your house into a home!

RR

Current Vibe...

I have to remind myself sometimes that restoring and reinventing isn’t just for furniture or an old home…it’s for me too!

I took a look back and realized that my last post was June 2018…and… I only posted once last year… :(

I truly can’t believe that, especially knowing how much I enjoy writing and sharing my photography. Speaking of photography, I was looking back through photos since June and it became apparent quite quickly how I’ve had very little time to sit down and put a post together and here are just a few reasons:

• One horse that became two after rescuing a beautiful soul in December.

• An amazingly beautiful wedding in November and I now have a sister.

• Bachelorette weekend, cottage weekends/vacations, work travel.

• Work.

• A bathroom renovation.

• A Winter Christmas Market showcasing my photography.

• Many scrumptious dinners and nights out with family and friends.

• A university course.

• Celebrating new chapters for friends (moving, babies etc).

• Wine and sunsets.

• House hunting/sitting.

The list could go on and on….

Through all of this, as much as I love working hard, moving at a mile a minute, the so many amazing events, days, moments of the past 6-9 months, I had started to feel a bit foggy…physically, emotionally….

Life was/is great but I was running low on my reserves and it was time for some restoration.

I looked at pictures of myself and asked, ‘where did that extra 15lbs come from?’, ‘do I really look that tired?’. I had some time off around the holidays and it was time to do some real soul searching. Life was getting the best of me and it was time to change the vibe…to start feeling like the energetic, full-of-life version of me again!

Again, life is allll good…I have/had zero complaints, but, I’d somehow lost track of what truly mattered….lost that feeling of taking care of me by putting myself on autopilot. I’d lost the drive or ambition to reinvent myself and was in a bit of a rut. When I start to lose that drive, when people actually comment that I’m not smiling as much as I usually do, I know it’s time to take a step back. I just needed to slow down, re-focus and then sit down, re-prioritize, plan and figure out what I needed to do to lift this fog.

Reinvention can seem to be a very ‘large word’….to have huge meaning. It may mean to some that an enormous transformation must occur and you become an entirely different version of you than before. For me, it means a better version, not a holistically different version.

So…..for 2019 I’ve been doing my best to say no more often (which is incredibly difficult for me), stay in, shift gears and be present. I’m back at the gym (almost back to pushing my university weights), I’m walking more, drinking more water, I’m eating better and I just signed up for a 5k….yes, you read that right. Talk about shifting gears!

None of these have been monumental changes by any means. If anything, the re-prioritizing of things like writing this post to help me be more aware and present or simply adding at least 30 minutes of activity to my day has helped to clear my mind for so many reasons. I get outside or go to the gym, I listen to a great podcast (Tim Ferriss is one of my favs!) and that time is truly for me. Now, the 5k is something totally new…have I mentioned i really, reallllly don’t like running. After years of figure skating I have these ‘friends’ called shin splints that can rear their ugly head at times. But…I wanted to stretch myself a bit…try something different. Signing up for the 5K will make me stay focused and be present. And…the good news is….my ‘friends’ haven’t made an appearance (knock on wood).

As I’m writing this, I look down at my tattoo that says, “Keep Calm and Believe”. Keeping calm through the rollercoaster that is life truly is a super power and believing in ones self is the fuel to keep moving forward on that rollercoaster, to allow yourself to shift gears because you know in your heart of hearts that a shift is necessary. That phrase has helped me to ground myself more times then I can recall…and has helped bring me back around to my current vibe….one where I truly do feel so much more focused, present and incredible!! I can do it, I deserve it and I will get it!

RR

Choose Discovery Through Pain.....

"Pain shapes a woman into a warrior." - R.H. Sin

It's a sunny Dad's Day and I'm lounging in the sunshine on the back deck, thinking how much Dad would have loved this day. It's the perfect day for a road trip to the lake, taking the back roads, in search of the sandy beaches of Lake Huron. Instead of being at the lake, I'm on my deck, reading quite a variety of material...everything from the Summer 2018 Issue of Magnolia Journal to The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson. 

Joanna Gaines writes about 'A Time to be Playful' and the importance of stepping outside of ones comfort zone, to be curious, to choose discovery. If there was one thing my Dad was was curious. We could never take the same route twice on our road trips and he never cared that it took an extra few minutes to get somewhere, as long as we took the scenic route. Joanna writes about something similar in this issue of Magnolia as well (I don't want to give it all away, but let's just say Chip loves a good 'scenic route' too).

Mark Manson writes about happiness coming from solving problems. He states, "Don't hope for a life without problems. Instead, hope for a life full of good problems."

"Our problems birth our happiness."

Perhaps one of my favourite lines yet in the book states, "What determines your success isn't, 'What do you want to enjoy?' The relevant question is, 'What pain do you want to sustain?' The path to happiness is a path full of shit-heaps and shame."

I never would have thought that by happy accident, I'd be able to draw a comparison between these two VERY different sets of reading material, but....I sure did...and reminded myself of a very valuable lesson along the way.

Let's use the analogy of learning to drive a standard vehicle for instance. My Dad, the oh so patient man that he was, taught me how to drive a standard shortly after I turned 16. Talk about stepping outside my comfort zone, choosing discovery and the 'birth of problems'. I honestly, to this day, don't know how I didn't end up dropping the transmission right out of the truck as it shuddered and shook across the field Dad was teaching me the art of 'driving a stick' in. Yes...a field...not the road....a field. Through a few tears and frustrated comments in a raised tone (both by yours truly), Dad remained calm, cool and collected, guiding me through this unknown activity to a word of discovery that is driving a manual transmission vehicle. To this day, I still get nervous when I get behind the wheel of a vehicle with a stick shift, but, I quickly think back to those days with Dad and his soothing tone and coaching and away I go. This was a 'good problem' to have (learning how to drive a standard) and yes, it has allowed me a great deal of happiness, even with the 'sustained pain' of the first time I stall after not having driven one for a while.

This may be a fairly 'simple' analogy, but as Mr. Manson also states, "Who you are is defined by what you're willing to struggle for." "Our struggles determine our successes." These two sentences bring some pretty hefty 'AH HA' moments to mind for me....

What does success truly mean to me and how much pain and struggle am I willing to bring into my life and muddle through (and potentially sustain) in order to achieve that success? A new challenge or goal can be a very scary and daunting thing to face, but again, if I truly do want it, I must be prepared for a certain amount (and sometimes a lot) of pain. Sometimes life events occur that are out of our control, such as the passing of a loved one, and all the pain and struggle that goes along with that and how we maneuver through that situation, can in fact lead us to happiness again, along with many lessons learned and a deeper sense of resilience to face the next unknown or struggle. "To be happy we need something to solve. Happiness is therefore a form of action; it's an activity, not something passively bestowed upon you." Our happiness needs to include the process to our desired outcome, not just the outcome. At times, the process can seem far from happy and we will experience pain, but again, the pain is part of the process and we must embrace that pain to reach out desired outcome.

I couldn't agree more with this by Mr. Manson..."Our problems birth our happiness, along with slightly better, slightly upgraded problems. See: it's a never-ending upward spiral. And if you think at any point you're allowed to stop climbing, I'm afraid you're missing the point. Because the joy is in the climb itself."

Today was a day filled with mixed emotions, "ah ha' moments, great reading and some key take aways to help me move forward.

First and foremost, choose discovery and keep climbing. As I get older, I see myself trending towards the known and comfortable....I'm not doing myself any favours by doing that because secondly, in order to continue on the ever evolving journey of happiness, I must be willing to experience and embrace pain, to continue to learn and grow and better myself. I'm prepared to 'struggle' for many things, but one thing I have realized over the past few years, what I struggle for or through, had to be of the utmost importance to me and not anyone else. I must put myself and my needs first in these 'struggles' to truly reap the benefits of the outcome. 

I cannot recommend both of these reads enough, though for very different, but yet similar reasons. I hope you can find some time this week or in the weeks to come to pick up a book or magazine that inspires you like these have inspired me.

I'll leave you with this....one of my favourite quotes about the formation of a warrior...

"The women whom I love and admire for their strength and grace, did not get that way because shit worked out. They got that way because shit went wrong and they handled it. They handled it in a thousand different ways, on a thousand different days, but they handled it. Those women are my superheroes." Elizabeth Gilbert

RR

What's On Your Heart?

I keep going back to last months Magnolia magazine for many reasons, but I keep being drawn to one article in particular, the one titled "On Mentoring - Generational Wisdom".

We all need a mentor or mentors in our lives and this article articulates why. Its doesn't have to be the 'big things', but the small gestures offered between both the mentor and 'mentoree' that help each individual grow and mature to be the best they can be. The relationship between these two gentlemen in the article really does seem to be a 'once in a lifetime' experience and from their words, it truly resonates how much they mean to each other. 

Have you ever had a first meeting like Poppa describes above? I've been lucky enough to have had a handful of these and for every person that this has occurred with, I'm still friends with and look up to and admire them. You can tell from his words just how important taking on a role of being a mentor has been in his life and after decades of support and daily conversations, I can only imagine how special the bond is between these two men. Jerry uses words such as 'encouragement' and 'priceless' to describe their relationship and you can tangibly feel/sense how much he looks forward to those 8am conversations...

Every word of this article hit home to me and the warmth and genuine respect for the human relationship warmed my heart...but.... one phrase really, really stuck out and I'm going to begin to use it in my everyday life, as I feel it is so important on so many levels and for so many reasons....

"What's on your heart for the day ahead?"

I LOVE THIS!!

He doesn't ask "what's on your mind?", but instead, "what's on your heart?". This warms my heart and soul to the core as it's probably one of the most important questions we can ask those we care about to truly 'check in' and get a gauge on where both their mind and heart stands for the day ahead. It pushes the respondent to 'dig deep' and potentially bring difficult or challenging feelings to the surface that could be a huge barrier for their day and even weeks ahead. I realize that this isn't a question we can just ask anyone, at least I would feel more comfortable asking this to someone I had a more established relationship with, but with that being said, I would feel comfortable asking someone I didn't quite as well if I sensed the person I was in conversation with was struggling with their day and was having difficulties finding the words to explain their thoughts/feelings. Again, it wouldn't be in every situation like that that I may come across...I'd have to 'go with my gut'...but it's a phrase that could also help build or take a relationship to the next level, as it's a question that requires some true soul searching and self awareness and being able to open up to the person asking you this requires a level of trust and understanding you would not find in every relationship in your life.

We're coming into a time of year that can be emotionally and mentally challenging for a number of people for a number of reasons. Loved ones and those we care about (including ourselves) can find the hustle and bustle and sentiment of the Christmas season to be too much at times and when we sense that occurring, why not offer to go get a coffee, ask that person about their day and dive into 'what's on their heart' at that moment. 

I truly believe that the words 'mentor' and 'friend' can be used interchangeably as both terms show a level of caring towards the other person in the relationship, for their overall well being and growth. This holiday season, why not challenge yourself to be that 'priceless' person and invest time in those you hold close to your heart and at the same time, if you feel you need a little extra encouragement and support, don't be afraid to tell someone close to you, what's on your heart too....

RR

Where Has This Year Gone??

How on earth is it November 19th??

This year has absolutely flown by and I can't get over how full every day is and when I say full, I mean it in only the best way!

I will fully admit that I haven't been spending as much as I would like to with the big guy (aka Lightning - my horse), but the time we do spend together is so good for my soul....and his too I think. I snapped this photo as he was eating his dinner and as he does so, I lean on him like he's a big, furry pillow. He munches away and I get to breath in the horsey aroma that has intoxicated me since I was a child. So simple, yet soooo good.

Speaking of big guys, it wouldn't be November without a trip to the Royal Winter Fair in Toronto. My bestie's family shows there every year so I went in to see her daughter and uncle show on a Sunday afternoon. The day I was there her daughter showed a Clydesdale in a line class and she did a fantastic job. These gentle giants are truly magnificent creatures and Clydes will always be my first love of the equine world.

There's something magical about the first snow and as I stepped out my front door at the City Cottage on the sunny morning after ours in Guelph, I couldn't help but smile and revel in the beauty that surrounded me. 

The second photo above is the view from the end of the laneway at my Moms home (the Country House). The tamaracks are so beautiful with their rusty-burnt orange hue this time of year...I was out gathering greenery and couldn't help but snap this photo.

The greenery I was collecting was for these....I got a head start on the Winter/Christmas decor at the Country House by putting together the planter inserts at the front door. Every piece contained in the insert is from our property and I'm beyond happy with how well they turned out.

They're so full with a variety of textures, from the hydrangeas to the cone flowers to the 'fluffy weeds', I just love them!!

I wouldn't have been able to pull these together without the help of this guy.....

My Charlie Bear helps me with the outdoor decor every year and this year he was right beside me, ensuring only the best from a quality control perspective... I just love him to bits and with that face, how can you not?

I hope you've had a wonderful November too and can you believe that it'll be Christmas in 5 short weeks?? I better start my shopping!!!

RR